AT CALVARY

 

Enduring in the Ways of Christ by LDS Bookstore

Today as I communed with Thee

You took me all the way to Calvary.

My heart stood still, the lessons came,

And taught me what in words I could not name.

I bow the knee and in thanks ascend to Thee

For all I learnt at Calvary.

 

-       CATHRYNE ALLEN 

YOUR LOVE DIVINE

 

My heart overflows with gratitude

For my darkest nights

Because they bring You to me

Flowing like a river with its strongest might.

I bask in Your presence,

I surrender my soul,

I am grounded in Your strength

I am strong enough to carry on.

- CATHRYNE ALLEN 

(Art: Jesus the Symbol of Hope by Ivan Guaderrama)

TO KNOW YOURSELF

 

“Why did the Lord ask such things of Abraham? Because, knowing what his future would be and that he would be the father of an innumerable posterity, He was determined to test him. God did not do this for His own sake for He knew by His foreknowledge what Abraham would do; but the purpose was to impress upon Abraham a lesson to enable him to attain unto knowledge that he could not obtain in any other way.

“That is why God tries all of us. It is not for his own knowledge for He knows all things beforehand. He knows all your lives and everything you will do. But He tries us for our own good that WE MAY KNOW OURSELVES; for it most important that a man should know himself.”

-          George Q. Cannon, (Gospel Truth, comp. Jerreld L. Newquist, 2 Vols [1974] 1:113)

I am beginning to see the truth of this. Just as God wanted Abraham to know what Abraham would do in the most severe of circumstances, he desires this for us too. We can only know what we will do if we are placed in a situation that requires our response. To know our commitment to God, we have to be asked to show it under adverse conditions.  To know our strength, we have to be asked to flex our muscles.

There are tests of faith where we have to reach back past our earthly lives and into our pre-mortal lives to discover who we truly are and have always been. Mortal life is a state of weakness. It’s also a state of inheritance of intergenerational habits and teachings we have be programmed to follow. That is not to say that because one of our parents was weak with something, we have to be weak too but sometimes breaking the cycle of weakness is a daunting task.

Many of us do not believe in ourselves. Either we have been taught to feel that way since birth or we have had a particularly adverse experience that has caused us to mistrust ourselves. The biggest disadvantage, however, is that we do not remember how brilliant we were before we came to this earth. Consider this thought:

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure…it is our light, not our darkness, which most frightens us. You may ask yourself, “Who am I to be brilliant, talented and fabulous?”  Actually, who are you NOT to be? You were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within you. It is not just some of us…. It is all of us. And as we let our light shine, we unconsciously give others permission to do the same. “ (Marianne Williamson, “A Return To Love – Reflections on the Principles of A Course in Miracles”)

We of the second estate were brave enough to fight the Son of the Morning and his angels for our turn on earth and our eternal destiny (Revelation 12:7-9; D&C 76:25-26; Moses 4:1-4; Isaiah 14:12-15; Abraham 3:27-28). This is the strength and this is the power which we need to reach back for when we are tested to be proven worthy of that which we wanted before we were born –  eternal life with God – our eternal destiny.

Right now I am going through the testing ground I did not expect. I feel like God has put me in a jail and said to me: “You will not be able to do anything unaided. I will bring you down to the depths of humility and show you your weakness and your strength. I will make you lose the you that you have become in this mortal shell and I will reveal to you who you have always been, who you were when you were with Me. To get to know yourself, you have to lose yourself.”

Our birth is but a sleep and a forgetting,

The soul that rises with us, our life’s star,

Hath had elsewhere its setting

And cometh from afar;

Not in entire forgetfulness,

And not in utter nakedness

But trailing clouds of glory

Do we come from God, who is our home.

(William Wordsworth, Ode on Intimations of Immortality)

 

- CATHRYNE ALLEN 

(Art: Enlightenment by Judy Cooley)

Judy Cooley Art – Uplifting & Joyful LDS Paintings – Altus Fine Art

A GLORIOUS HOPE

 

“When we go out of this life, leave this body, we will desire to do many things we cannot do at all without the body. We will be seriously handicapped and we will long for the body; we will pray for early reunion with our bodies. We will know then what advantage it is to have a body….” (Melvin J. Ballard, “Crusade for Righteousness” p 213)

I have never much appreciated my body in until I entered the stage of prolonged bad health. Simple tasks became huge ordeals and successfully putting on socks came to be a triumph. I have longed to walk unassisted and to perform the simplest tasks with ease, the ones I used to take for granted.

The other day as I was struggling with my socks and its frustration, I came to understand the above quote. I could see how a spirit without a body he or she once experienced would feel without it. Indeed, we get a glimpse of that from President Joseph F. Smith’s vision of the spirit world which tells us that ‘the dead looked upon the long absence of their spirits from their bodies as a bondage’ (D&C 138:50). I began to appreciate that maybe my body is a privilege……

The other day I quoted Melvin J. Ballard who shared his conviction of our unreserved willingness to come to earth and obtain a body whether it be cripped, maimed, or deformed. I thought as I was struggling with my socks, surely those afflicted with such bodies would have regretted that choice. I know all about physical pain and limit of movement. I cannot imagine that to be my whole earthly experience.

Elder Ballard continued to express our pre-earthly knowledge of the necessity of a body for our ascension to godhood which enabled us to be centered on an eternal view rather than the sorrows and troubles of this life ("Sermons and Missionary Services of Melvin J. Ballard, p 179). Reconciling our pre-earthly perspective and the reality of living on this side of the veil is something of a challenge though.

In his last conference talk Elder Bednar spoke about enduring to the end and he connected to it a very necessary component, that of trust. It is something that has been on my mind of late. As I considered his talk I realized that this is the key to acceptance of earthly suffering and the power to endure to the end.

I realized my willingness to trust that my life is playing out according to God’s plan for me and my trust that what is to come in next life is imperative for my existence here and now.

And my ultimate trust comes with a hope which is this: to be faithful and valiant in my testimony of Jesus whilst in mortality with ‘a hope of a glorious resurrection, through the grace of God the Father and his Only Begotten Son, Jesus Christ’ (D&C 138:12-14)

Because the valleys do not

Lead to where I need to be,

You give me mountains to climb

To reach Your divinity.

 

You are so high

And my reach is so low.

To come to Your arms

I accept the mountains

That show me which way to go.

- CATHRYNE ALLEN 

(Art: Ponder Anew by LDS Book Store)

TRUST

 

"There is a story told that a company of botanists seeking some special flowers up in the Canadian Rockies, came one day to a very rare flower down on the side of a cliff.  To reach it they would have to retrace their steps and go back ten miles to come up from the valley below.  Someone suggested that if they had a rope they could let a boy down to pick the specimens.  That suggestion was prompted by the fact that a little boy had been following them for about an hour, watching them silently.  They got the rope and said:

 

'Here lad, we'll give you $5 if you will put this rope around you and permit us to let you down to get those flowers'. Without saying a word the lad scampered off.  They thought they had frightened him.  He went to a house nearby and soon came back with a man by his side.  Then the little fellow answered: ‘You may put that rope around me, and I'll get the flower, if you'll let my dad hold the rope'." (President David O. McKay, CR. April 1944)

 

When you study the scriptures you can see so clearly the intimate and close connection the Saviour had with the Father whilst in mortality. He spoke of Him incessantly. Once I counted 163 references that He made to the Father during His visit to the Americas. Fifteen of those referenced His obedience to Him which included the sacrifice He was to offer and save the rest of us (John 10:17-18).

 

The closeness Jesus felt to the Father during His life was such that when He told His disciples that they will scatter and leave Him in the end, He said with assurance: “….yet I am not alone, because the Father is with me” and “He that sent me is with me: the Father hath not left me alone; for I do always those things that please Him (John 8:29; 16:32).

 

This is a clear indication that Jesus felt sure the Father would be with Him during His atoning sacrifice  and so perhaps it was not just sheer obedience but also trust that there will be a rope around Him to the very end. Perhaps this trust played a big part in enabling Him to say, “not mine, but Thy will be done” as He began to submit to His excruciating ordeal (Matthew 26:39).  

Imagine then the shock when He was descending into the bottomless pit of human suffering to discover there was no rope around Him, like in the Garden, and no Father to catch Him….when He uttered that heart breaking question asking why the Father had forsaken Him (Matthew 27:46). There are reasons why it had to be so but the startling point is, the Saviour was utterly and totally alone.

Here again there had to be trust even though the rope was not there. There had to be trust that He could finish His crucible until every soul was atoned for and until He could give His all in the voluntary surrender of His life (John 10:18). There had to be trust until He could say: “It is finished” (John 19:30)

I have been puzzled by the concept of suffering my entire life. I used to think there had to be a better way to exaltation, for the Saviour and for us. Over time I received glimpses here and there about that necessity but none of these intellectual explanations seemed to make a dent into my understanding pertaining to my life. The other day I had a revelation about it so intense and so poignant that it took the explanation of my life to another level.

Through it I learnt something extremely important: the Eternal Father knows me to the depths of my soul and the plan for my life which I agreed to before I was born was so finely crafted that it has the power to prepare me for something much greater. I came away from that experience sobbing and understanding His mercy for the life He had planned for me. All I have to do is trust that there is a rope around my waist like Christ ‘who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross’ (Hebrews 12:2).

- CATHRYNE ALLEN 

(Art: Thy Will Be Done by Jay Bryant Ward)

 

THE HARDEST ROAD

 

When, following much suffering in Liberty Jail, Joseph Smith begged God for deliverance in March of 1839, The Lord offered him peace and comforted him by telling him his afflictions would be but a small moment.

I don’t know what comfort that was to Joseph who was in the thick of things but I know it gave him hope and I believe it came via this promise:

“If thou art called to pass through tribulation; if thou art in perils among false brethren, if thou art in perils among robbers, if thou art in perils by land or by sea; if thou art accused with all manner of false accusations, if thine enemies fall upon thee….and thou be dragged to prison, and thine enemies prowl around thee like wolves for the blood of the lamb….

“And if thou shouldst be cast into the pit or into the hands of murderers, and the sentence of death passed upon thee, if thou be cast into the deep, if the billowing surge conspire against thee, if fierce winds become thine enemy; if the heavens gather blackness, and all the elements combine to hedge up the way; and above all, if the very jaws of hell shall gape open the mouth wide after thee, know thou, my son, that all these things shall give thee experience, and shall be for thy good.” (D&C 122:5-7)

The hope would have been based on this one promise: “…if thou endure it well, God shall exalt thee on high….” (D&C 121:8). This is the ultimate reward. Joseph had many revelations. The heavens were opened to him on a number of occasions. He might have known what that promise really looked like.

We, on the other hand, don’t have a proper concept of exaltation in this earthly life. We cannot conceive what it is like. We don’t see it or understand it…and we can’t imagine it. We are in the telestial world. What we do know is that exaltation comes at a price. A hard road has to be travelled to earn it. Joseph proved this.

I do know one thing. When we were in the realms of heaven, we had the picture of exaltation before us and we understood well what it would take to qualify for it. I do not believe everyone wanted it because of the hard road that led to it. I think some of us chose easier roads that led to lower kingdoms (see D&C 88:28-32).

Those of us who wanted exaltation were willing to risk a perilous journey “by land or by sea”. In fact, I am sure we covenanted we would travel it and that we would endure for the reward…and for one reason…..the Saviour would pay the price of suffering, greater than any of us can begin to imagine, ensuring our ability to endure….(D&C 122:8)

Now that we are here travelling, may we always remember the promised reward which Joseph himself received: “For I am the Lord thy God, and will be with thee even until the end of the world, and through all eternity; for verily I seal upon you your exaltation, and prepare a throne for you in the kingdom of my Father…..” (D&C 132:49)

- CATHRYNE ALLEN

(Art: Lord and Master by Greg Collins)

PURPOSE

 

Over the years I have had revelations that had given me clarity about my life’s difficulties but this morning I was given such clear understanding that it made me reflect on our purpose here at a deeper level.

I am beginning to see that salvation is not an individual responsibility but a collective effort to save the human family. We are not single entities but links in a chain that binds us together in the Plan of Salvation. Some of us might never survive without the efforts of those around us.

And here is an important component of this principle. We cannot strengthen others without having had experience in difficulties ourselves which give us compassion, empathy and wisdom. Alma is a great example of this. Alma became the single greatest missionary in the ancient Americas who baptised ‘thousands of souls’ (Alma 4:4,5)

He could never have obtained his zeal for relentless missionary service had he not faced the jaws of hell during his 3 days of repentance (Alma 36:6-24; 43:1). His amazing sorrowing for people was born walking through the fire of his own experience with sin ((Alma 7:5; 8:10,14; 31:1,2,30,31; 35:15).

One of the greatest lessons I learnt from the Old Testament is about being a link in the chain. As ancient Israel conquered cities before them, lands were appropriated to them for their settlement. Among the first to receive land were the tribes of Reuben, Gad and half of Mannesah. They settled in the land of Gilead which divided them from the rest of Israel by the river Jordan (Numbers 34:14,15; Deuteronomy 3:12,13; Joshua 22:9).

After they had assisted in further conquest of the land, Joshua sent them back to Gilead to live peacefully in their newly appointed inheritance. Upon their return home, these tribes built an altar by the river Jordan. When the rest of Israel heard of it they were outraged presuming the altar was built for idol worship.

These three tribes had to defend themselves by explaining the altar was built to be "a witness between us that the Lord is God" (Joshua 22:34) and that even though they were geographically divided from the rest, they were still a link in the chain. They knew that if they turned to the worship of other gods, the ripple effect would be detrimental to the spiritual salvation of the whole House of Israel.

My greatest lesson in all this is my belief that the difficulties we go through are not just for our benefit but for a human being we might have the ability to save. We are the under-shepherds and saviours on mount Zion following in the footsteps of the greatest healer who did the same by taking upon himself our infirmities that His bowels may be filled with mercy, according to the flesh that He might know how to give relief and aid to the human family in their suffering (Alma 7:12).

I am just now beginning to understand the willingness of Him who embraced pain for our sake…..

Next time you are suffering through something, know there might be a greater purpose….

- CATHRYNE ALLEN 

(Art: Knock and Ye Shall Receive by LDS Art)

REMEMBER

I was reminded today by a beloved friend that some days we need to rely on remembering our special moments because it is all we have. It is the days we feel unloved, forsaken, directionless, and alone in our suffering. My special moments are my glimpses into heaven. They keep me going when I wonder, despite all my knowledge and testimony, is all this worth it….

It would seem that heaven thinks remembering is the way to go too because I don’t think there is a more significant word in the Book of Mormon that is repeated more often than the word ‘remember’. It was an important concept amongst the ancient Israel who used festivals, harvests and commemoration days for this purpose.

King Benjamin spoke of ‘remembering’ 15 times in his speech to his sons and to the people gathered to hear him (Mosiah 1:3,4,6,7,17; 2:40 twice, 41 twice; 4:11,28,30; 5:11,12; 6:3).  Alma used the verb ‘remember’ 6 times in speaking to his sons (Alma 37:13,14,32,35; 42:11). Helaman used it 11 times in speaking to his sons in Helaman 5. The legacy of remembrance passed on from Alma to Helaman was so strong that Helaman named his sons Nephi and Lehi for this very purpose (Helaman 5:6).

Perhaps the greatest example of the importance of this word comes from Alma and this is why. As he lay unconscious he ‘remembered’ his father’s prophecy concerning the coming of Jesus Christ and when he pleaded with Christ to have mercy on him, he could not ‘remember’ his pains anymore (Alma 36:17, 19). Remembering brought Alma to Christ.

When we pass on from this life, we hope we will be remembered for ‘something’. None of us want to be forgotten. Nephi is remembered for his obedience, Alma for his repentance, Helaman for his strategic warfare, Captain Moroni for his passionate patriotism, Mormon for his discipleship, Moroni for his endurance, but one thing they all have in common…….they remembered Christ, always….in all their endeavours.

I don’t want accolades at my funeral. I am hoping that people will ‘remember’ what I have taught them about the Saviour and that they will talk of Him. My fear is that I would be remembered for not enduring to the end. I know remembrance of my glimpses into heaven are crucial for my endurance.

The Saviour died over 2,000 years ago and He is still remembered by many but many are also trying to forget Him. He, however, will never forget us…..because….He has graven us upon  the palms of His hands  and He has worn the crown of thorns on His head (Isaiah 49:16; John 19:2). In the words of a dear friend Bonnie Lake Bloomfield:

 

I don’t know how the sun remembers to rise,

Or how the stars remember their places.

I don’t know how the flowers remember to bloom,

Or how in spring the leaves fill their spaces.

It’s enough for me to know who created it,

And I’ll never be the same;

Because I know I have a God who loves me

And a King, who remembers my name.

 

My King, who remembers my name;

A mighty King, who remembers my name!

He is the Lord of all creation,

And yet, my King remembers my name.

I’m a small creature compared to His greatness;

I’m only one and the same,

But I’ll always be His, and He will be mine –

A King, who remembers my name!

 

I look at the world today with people

Rushing about without thinking of why;

Why we’re all here, and what is life about

And where we all go when we die.

But I know, and I’ll ever be thankful

That I know from whence I came.

I’ll go home to heaven once more,

To my King, who remembers my name.

 

- CATHRYNE ALLEN 

(Art: Crown of Thorns by Mindi Oaten)

 

FOR THE JOY

 

 

I write a lot of posts about Christ and post a lot of pictures of Him. I have noticed more and more people reacting favourably to pictures of a happy Christ. It seems we don’t like to see Him unhappy or somber or suffering. I guess we have had those pictures for too long. One of my readers commented recently: “It’s good to see Him smiling. Gives hope”. The inference is, if He could be happy after all He endured, there is hope for us too. I loved it because It made me think of the following scripture:

“Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith; who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is set down at the right hand of the throne of God (Hebrews 12:2).

Yes, Christ endured unfathomable suffering focusing on the joy that would come following: the joy of His triumph and the eternal reward that awaited Him, but not only that….He did it for the joy that awaited all of us who believe in Him and accept Him. He knew so well what was at stake if He failed, and He knew really well the joy that would be ours if death was overcome, immortality granted and eternal life made possible. This was His focus and this was His joy…..to give us what we could not give ourselves. The love supreme, the mercy unfathomable.

Perhaps we need to remember more often where the Saviour is now that the crucible of His life is over. And this is where we will be if we carry our cross and endure in faith to the end. When you confront your own suffering, remember, the joy will come in the morning. Even if your battle spans the entirety of your life, it will not be forever…….but the joy will be. Remember the suffering Christ and have hope. He is where you can be……..and He is happy knowing the joy that awaits you.

Teach me dear God to look upward

And hope for the glories

That will one day be mine.

Help me to rise on wings of faith;

Lift me above valleys,

Mountains and seas

That I might forsake this world of suffering

And fly with haste to Thee.

- CATHRYNE ALLEN 

(Art: Radiant Saviour by Chris Brazelton)

ETERNAL PERSPECTIVE

 

 “We talk about our trials and troubles here in this life, but suppose that you could see yourselves thousands and millions of years after you have proved faithful to your religion during the few short years in this time, and have obtained eternal salvation and a crown of glory in the presence of God; then look back upon your lives here, and see the losses, crosses and disappointments, the sorrows arising from disobedient children, from wicked parents who have opposed their children who wished to embrace the truth, the persecutions from city to city, from state to state, being hunted and driven, you would be constrained to exclaim: ‘But what of all that? Those things were but for a moment, and we are now here. We have been faithful during a few moments in our mortality and now we enjoy eternal life and glory with power to progress in all the boundless knowledge and through the countless stages of progression, enjoying the smiles and approbation of our Father and God, and of Jesus Christ our elder brother.” (Brigham Young, Teachings of Presidents of the Church)

“I have fought a good fight, I have finished my course, I have kept the faith; henceforth, there is laid up for me a crown of righteousness which the Lord, the righteous judge, shall give me at that day: and not to me only, but unto all them also that love His appearing.”  (1 Timothy 4:7,8)

I would rather be a vessel in Your hand

Than a crowned king on earthly throne;

I would rather be a bird in flight

Without a shelter to keep me warm;

I would rather cross the oceans

And go where you would want me to go

Than sit contented never knowing

the trail that leads me home.

- CATHRYENE ALLEN

(Art: Guiding Them Home by Yongsung Kim)

THE BITTER CUP

 

“The scriptures tell us that Christ was ‘sore amazed’ at how exquisite the pain whilst in the Garden of Gethsemane (Mark 14:32-34). When we come to the moments in our lives when we ourselves are ‘sore amazed’, we are lifted to higher ground, the ground the Saviour stood on. It is in these moments in life that we connect to the reality of His suffering. Once we have made that connection, we become empowered to endure sorrow and pain and triumph over every foe of this earthly life, even as He did. The Saviour then becomes real and the Atonement becomes active in our lives.”

The above quote is something I wrote years ago when understanding of suffering came upon me. It is always a sobering moment when an idealist meets a challenge to their ideals though. I am that idealist. I believe in the ideal but living without it in this life has been a struggle for me. I am still trying to grasp the meaning of suffering on an emotional level. Understanding something intellectually and understanding it emotionally can be worlds apart. Understanding emotionally involves experience and experience sometimes means pain.

Consider Job. The most endearing thing about him was not his persistent endurance, as admirable as that was, but that his suffering caused him to be ‘weary of life’ and wish he had never been born (Job 3:3; 10:1). What an exquisite blend of excellence and humanity. Maybe Job teaches us that there is as much honour in pressing forward despite our lack of desire to do so as there is in cheerfully bearing our misfortunes without any complaint. I applaud those who can do the latter for in my opinion they are not many. Most of us don’t find joy in suffering. The honour is in not giving up rather than believing that we should be strong enough to never complain and thereby beating ourselves up from ensuing guilt that comes from such an expectation. I have known such guilt, I am an idealist.

The Saviour has had the hardest life of any of us. Even He asked for ‘the cup’ to be removed from Him (Mark 14:36) but His integrity did not fail Him and He drank the bitter dregs and thereby paved the way for us to do the same (John 18:11; 3 Nephi 11:11; D&C 19:18). Job endured and was rewarded with double of what he previously had (Job 42:10). The Saviour endured and He became the God of Heaven and inherited all that the Father has. May we be valiant in doing the same and follow the path to glory that awaits us.

Teach me dear God to look upward

And hope for the glories

That will one day be mine.

Help me to rise on wings of faith;

Lift me above valleys,

Mountains and seas

That I might forsake this world of suffering

And fly with haste to Thee.

- CATHRYNE ALLEN 

(Art: Come and See by Tyler Anderson)

FULFILLING OUR PURPOSE

 

I am amazed at Moroni who did everything in his power to preserve his life, only to wander in loneliness between 385 A.D. to 421 A.D. (Mormon 6:5; Moroni 1), totally 36 whopping years. And here is something interesting. Moroni didn’t spend 36 years just evading the Lamanites who hunted and killed anyone who wouldn’t deny Christ  (Moroni 1:2,3), he instead did something extraordinary….he wrote extensively and preserved the plates with intent to bring us and the very same people who hunted him for his life to the knowledge of truth ‘in some future day’ (v4). This is what I call mortal valiancy. Because of his valiant efforts, we now have the Book of Mormon. 

 

I don’t know what Moroni’s 36 years looked like. I don’t know if he ever felt so lonely and depressed that he was hitting the floor but I do know that he endured to fulfil his purpose because in his farewell he said: “….the time speedily cometh that ye shall know that I lie not, for ye shall see me at the bar of God, and the Lord God will say unto you: Did I not declare my words unto you, which were written by THIS MAN…???” (Moroni 10:27). We all have a purpose and something to achieve in this life, and that something, no matter how small, if achieved during our mortal endurance, will not be counted less than what Moroni achieved. 

 

I have experienced acute loneliness in my life and I know I have only survived it because of the sustaining power of the Great Exemplar who endured it all and could say: “…..I partook and finished my preparations unto the children of men” (D&C 19:19). What a gift He has given us by His power of creation (Helaman 14:12; Moses 1:33; 2:1); the gift of mortal lowliness that He might lift us to immortal heights. This is the God we worship, this is the God we love, this is the God we follow. May we praise Him now and forever. 

 

My mortality spreads before me day and night,

I wince at bearing this heavy load.

I stumble and I fall,

The darkness seeking to swallow me whole.

I know He waits at heaven’s gate

Till I have learnt to walk the rough domain;

I will hurry, I will run

I will grasp the heaven’s hand

That will lift me to His arms

Forever there to remain.

 

 

- CATHRYNE ALLEN

(Art by Liz Lemon Swindle)

MIGHTY TO ENDURE

 

"If all the sick for whom we pray were healed, if all the righteous were protected and the wicked destroyed, the whole program of the Father would be annulled and the basic principle of the gospel, free agency, would be ended. No man would have to live by faith. 

If joy and peace and rewards were instantaneously given the doer of good, there would be no evil – all would do good but not because of the rightness of doing good. There would be no test of strength, no development of character, no growth of powers, no free agency, only satanic controls. Should all prayers be immediately answered according our desires and our limited understanding, then there would be little or no suffering, sorrow, disappointment, or even death, and if these were not, there would also be no joy, success, resurrection, nor eternal life and godhood.” 

(President Spencer W. Kimball, Faith Precedes the Miracle, p 97).

 

I have just one thing to add to this powerful message. Years ago I read an article written by a young woman in the Church whose father had died of cancer. She described his end as horrific. She said she learnt that the popular belief that ‘God would not give us anything we could not handle’ is false. She was convinced that God would do exactly that, for one purpose and one purpose only, to bring us to Christ, because this is what happened to her father. I wholeheartedly agree with this concept because I believe that everything in this life is designed for this very purpose: to bring us to the Saviour who can make us mighty to endure; deliver us from any evil; and ultimately bring us to salvation. Whatever the plan for our life, whatever the individual tutoring we have agreed to before we were born, we have this promise: “I will go before you and be your rearward; and I will be in your midst…..” (D&C 49:27).

 

The winds of tribulation scatter my hopes

Like feathers they lift to the sky

They find you there ever waiting to answer my pleas

To restore that which is lost

To renew that which is broken

To gift that which was never foreseen

To make me rise to heights unknown

- CATHRYNE ALLEN 

A FALL FROM GRACE, A FALL FROM GLORY

"Do we emphasize the David who killed Goliath, or the David who killed Uriah? Should we view him as the servant who refused to lift his hand against the Lord's anointed, or as the Lord's anointed who lifted his hand against a faithful and loyal servant? Was his life a tragedy or a triumph?" (Old Testament Student Manual, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, p 287)

David's accomplishments were not only great but they were great accomplishments. David did three things for temporal Israel that typify what Christ will do for spiritual Israel.  Following Saul's death, Israel's kingdom was divided in two for seven years. The tribe of Judah accepted David as their king and the rest of the tribes of Israel were ruled by Ishbosheth, one of the sons of Saul, whom Abner, Saul's commanding general set up as the new king (2 Sam 2:8-9). Despite being anointed as Israel's king, by Samuel, the prophet, David refrained from taking action against Ishbosheth in honour of the covenant he made with Jonathan not to retaliate against Saul's family when he came to power. Following Ishbosheth's murder (2 Samuel 3) David showed great wisdom and judgment by executing the two men responsible. This brought him into favour with the tribes under Ishbosheth and ultimately united all twelve tribes into one nation under the ultimate leadership of God. Secondly, David succeeded in winning the whole extent of the promised land for the covenant people. For the first time the chosen people of the Lord controlled the whole land promised to Abraham's posterity nearly a thousand years earlier. Thirdly, David established Zion or Jerusalem as the spiritual and political center of Israel. Under David's reign Israel reached its golden age. Never before had Israel achieved such heights of power nor did they ever again. (Old Testament Student Manual, p 291)

Despite all his great accomplishments David made one very big error of judgment. He became very comfortable as a monarch of a successful kingdom. This comfort zone became detrimental to his ability to endure to the end. As his kingdom ran like a well oiled machine, his approach to his kingly duties became somewhat lax. "At the time when kings go forth to battle" (2 Sam 11:1) David chose to send Joab and all Israel to fight Ammonites while he remained in Jerusalem, strolling upon the roof of his house to cool off in the heat of the night. This was David's first and big mistake that began his gradual demise into depths of sin from which he could not extricate himself. Sin seldom happens in one giant leap. As Elder Boyd K. Packer says: "I don't think anyone steps off a precipice into the depths of immorality and apostasy. They slide down the slippery sides of the chasm...." (Improvement Era. May 1970, p. 7)  It would seem that David didn't think he needed his armour of God on such a hot night while he was lounging and relaxing away from battle but the adversary doesn't take sabbaticals and he took advantage of David's lack of protection. David spotted a temptation bigger than the Goliath he slew so valiantly some years prior. Not turning away once he happened to see a woman washing herself his gaze lingered enough to discover she was beautiful. Not content with leaving it there, he inquired about her. This should have stopped him in his tracks for the reply he got was that her name was Bathsheba (which means "daughter of the covenant") and that she was married to a man called Uriah (which means "Jehovah is my light"). These two names alone should have lifted him to a higher plain but 'his casualness in righteous things had dulled his spiritual senses' (Bruce Satterfield, Lesson 24,  "Create In Me A Clean Heart", Meridian Magazine). The adultery that happened next was tragic but what happened after it was devastating. David dared to believe that he could conceal his sin, not just from Israel but from God. As he devised one plan after another to cover his sin he developed a treacherous character that led him to the loss of his salvation. When he failed to entice Uriah to spend time with his wife so that the conceived child could be passed off as his, David allowed the spirit of murder to enter his heart. He devised a plan that would insure Uriah's death at the front lines of battle and took Bathsheeba to be his wife. At what point do you think David could have stopped himself from advancing towards the edge of the precipice? None of this need have happened if David was at the right place at the right time, namely, out on the battle field instead of the roof of his house.

David had many wives and concubines which were given to him of the Lord by the hand of Nathan, the prophet (D&C 132:39). It was Nathan who was sent to prick David's conscience regarding the one wife that was not given to him of God and which 'displeased the Lord' (2 Sam 11:27). Nathan recounted a parable to David in these words:  "There were two men in one city; the one rich, and the other poor. The rich man had exceeding many flocks and herds: But the poor man had nothing, save one little ewe lamb, which he had bought and nourished up: and it grew up together with him, and with his children; it did eat of his own meat, and drank of his own cup, and lay in his bosom, and was unto him as a daughter. And there came a traveller unto the rich man, and he spared to take of his own flock and of his own herd, to dress for the wayfaring man that was come unto him; but took the poor man's lamb, and dressed it for the man that was come to him" (2 Sam 12:2-4). Perhaps the most sombre words spoken to anyone in the scriptures were Nathan's words to David as he responded to David's outrage about the rich man who took the poor man's lamb and prepared it as a meal to a weary traveller whilst sparing so many lambs that he owned. At David's insistence that the man should be put to death for such a selfish act, Nathan's response to him cut deep as he said: "Thou art the man" (2 Sam 12:7). Nathan then continued to recount all that the God of Israel had done for David, pointing out his gross sin of murder and prophesying all the calamities that would befall him. He would not be put to death as the law required but he was given a worse punishment than that. The child born to David and Bathsheeba died and David lived to see many of his wives and sons turn against him and much of his household turn to infighting and blood.

Unlike Saul, David acknowledged where he had gone wrong and suffered godly sorrow that brought him to repentance. His sins, however, were grievous and even though he will eventually receive forgiveness in the sense that all sins are forgiven except the sin against the Holy Ghost, the forgiveness he will receive will not assure him axaltation. In the LDS Bible Dictionary we read: "Like Sault he was guilty of grave crimes, but unlike Saul, he was capable of true contrition and was therefore able to find forgiveness, except in the murder of Uriah. As a consequence David is still unforgiven but he received a promise that the Lord would not leave his soul in hell. He will be resurrected at the end of Millennium", meaning he will receive the telestial glory. Is this not a tragedy of gigantic proportion? A great man who accomplished so much, who had unwavering faith in God, who stood to remain a king throughout all eternity, will be resurrected to the lowest kingdom of glory. Joseph Smith said that David could get forgiveness only through hell but that his soul would not be left there. The question begs to be asked, who wishes to spend a term in hell with the devil before being cleansed from sin? If you are sitting on the edge of the precipice pushing the boundaries every which way, as far as you can, move. The cost of your falling will far outweigh the thrill and excitement of the edge.

David was promised by God that his throne shall be established through Christ forever, that he would become the progenitor of the Messiah and Saviour of the world (2 Sam 7:16). Jesus thus came into mortality as a descendant of David, through his mother, and as an heir to his throne both physically and spiritually. Elder James E. Talmage explains it like this: "At the time of the Saviour's birth, Israel was ruled by alien monarchs. The rights of the royal Davidic family were unrecognized; and the ruler of the Jews was an appointee of Rome. Had Judah been a free an independent nation, ruled by her rightful sovereign, Joseph the carpenter would have been her crowned king; and his lawful successor to the throne would have been Jesus of Nazareth, the King of the Jews". (Jesus The Christ, p. 87)

So David, a man of greatness who left such a huge mark on the world and who became an ancestor to the most important figure in human history turned out to be a study in tragedy. As we study this tragedy we cannot fail to recognise that the fall from grace is extremely easy. Sometimes we think we can handle a little temptation, that we are bigger than the pull of sin, or that we are strong enough to stand in the side lines and just watch but if you give in to the desire to watch, you will eventually have the desire to do.  And sometimes we don't like to be regimented by the Church and we allow our 'right for freedom' to loosen that armour of God and it starts to slip and eventually it becomes a nuisance to us and we remove it altogether endangering our ability to endure to the end for no matter how great you started off, what matters more is how great you end up.

It is never too late to turn around and go the other way. The road of repentance might be rough and steep as opposed to the smooth road that requires nothing of us and that leads to nowhere. You might get a few blisters and a few cuts but if you press on, by the time you come full circle you will be a possessor of a humble heart worthy of the redemptive power which can make you clean. The Saviour waits ready to forgive and to encircle you in the arms of his love.

What win I if I gain the thing I seek?
A dream, a breath, a froth of fleeting joy?
Who buys a minute's myrth to wail a week
Or sells eternity to get a toy?
For one sweet grape, who would the vine destroy?
Or what fond beggar but to touch the crown,
Would with the scepter straight be stricken down.

- William Shakespeare