THE BOOK OF LIFE

 

Book of Life by Chris Brazelton

Because I am a writer, the very essence of me has been spilt on paper….in my journals, my blogs, my poetry.  My thoughts, feelings, perceptions, understanding, my lessons, my experience here on earth…is all documented. I often look at my journals and notebooks I have used as my companions over the years and I feel sorrow that I will leave them behind when I am called home.

I am convinced that I was a writer in my pre-earth life and that all my writing is waiting for me somewhere in a room that was my very own….and so I  have also hoped that there would be someone I know in heaven who has copied all my earthly writing to add to the existing stash for me to own for eternity.

There just so happens to be a book in heaven in which are recorded names of the righteous who will be immortalized in the analls of eternal history. This book is called the Book of Life:

“In one sense the Book of Life is the total of a person’s thoughts and actions – the record of his life. However, the scriptures also indicate that a heavenly record is kept of the faithful, including their names and accounts of their righteous deeds (Rev 3:5; 20:12; D&C 88:2;128:6-7; Alma 5:58) .”  (LDS Guide to the Scriptures, Book of Life)

A St George Temple worker by the name of Elder John Mickelson Lang received a revelation in 1928 regarding the Book of Life that explains the process of this record keeping:

“Every spirit that comes to earth has a guardian angel, whose duty it is to keep a record of the individual’s parentage, the conditions under which it was born, its inheritance, environment, thoughts and desires, and when the individual’s life is completed, the guardian angel’s mission ends. It returns, makes its report and hands in the record it has kept. This record is placed upon the other book, spoken of as The Book of Life. All this gave me to understand that in this other book is preserved the names and perfect dates of every spirit that ever came to earth.” (Joseph Heinerman, Temple Manifestations, (1836-1930), St George Temple)

 

I want to remember the beauty

Surrendered by the withered rose

And all the memories of my life

Near and far,

I want to take them with me

When I am called to cross the bar.

- CATHRYNE ALLEN 

MORTALITY

 

"On my way to visit the Jameses the other evening, I saw a wheat field that appeared to be greener and taller than the others. Thinking about it for a while, I concluded that occasionally some loving farmer drives over the field with his tractor and dumps manure all over it. I thought, "My, it's just like life. Here we are minding our own business, growing our little hearts out. We're really quite green, somewhat productive and very sincere. When out of the blue, life deals us a dirty one, and we're up to our eyebrows in manure. We, of course, conclude that life as we have known it has just ended and will never be the same again. But one day, when the smell and the shock are gone we find ourselves greener and more productive than we have ever been! Unfortunately, no matter how often we go through these growing experiences, we are never able to appreciate the sound of the tractor or the smell of the manure."

- Harold W. Wood

 

My mortality spreads before me day and night,

I wince at bearing this heavy load.

I stumble and I fall,

The darkness seeking to swallow me whole.

I know He waits at heaven’s gate

Till I have learnt to walk the rough domain;

I will hurry, I will run

I will grasp the heaven’s hand

That will lift me to His arms

Forever there to remain.

 

- CATHRYNE ALLEN 

(Art by Ivan Guaderrama)

THE DESCENT

 

“Christ’s Atonement was a descent into the seemingly “bottomless pit” of human agony. He took upon himself the sins of the most wretched of all sinners; he descended beneath the cruelest tortures devised by man. His downward journey encompassed the transgressions of those who ignorantly sinned; it incorporated that quantum of suffering unrelated to spiritual error, but nonetheless viably acute in stinging proportions – the agony of loneliness, the pain of inadequacy, the suffering of infirmities and sickness. In the course of His divine descent He was assaulted with every temptation inflicted on the human race……“He descended below all things” (D&C 88:6).”  (Tad R. Callister, “The Infinite Atonement” p 104,5)

If you can find yourself somewhere in that bottomless pit of human agony herein described, don’t despair. There is someone who has met you there and taken upon himself all your suffering. I bear my witness of this truth.

My first major trial lasted 11 years and when it was over I felt shattered and hanging by a thread. This is when I learnt what the Saviour can do through the power of His Atonement. I knew only He could deliver me from the pain I was in and I sought to make the Atonement active in my life. I affirmed my faith in Jesus Christ and asked for its healing power many times during the day. The healing came in such magnitude as I had not expected. It grounded me in my faith of Him as if I was nailed with the spikes of the cross.

During my second major trial, which lasted 20 years, the Atonement of Christ remained active in my life to ensure my survival. Time and time again, He lifted me out of that pit to keep me going. When it was finished, I was given the promise of eternal life. I began to see this earthly life as insignificant in comparison and came to understand what Paul meant when he said if we have faith regarding this life only, we will be of all men most miserable (1 Cor 5:19). My focus on what is yet to come was born.

This time, in my third major trial, I have noticed the power of the Atonement active in my life again differently. I have recognised what it is making of me. Last week, in my extremity, I finally relinquished control and was able to say with heartfelt commitment and all the energy of my soul: “Thy will be done”. No pleading for relief, no pleading for a healing, no pleading for mercy, no battles, just surrender…..just, “Thy will be done”. It was a peace I have never known before.

I prayed in faith

That you would save me

From the river of my tears.

 

You took my soul and rescued me

 And promised I’ll be more than I could be

If I look toward eternity.

 

I look to You in every thought

And surrender all my fears;

Your sacred promise like a flame

Locked in my heart these many years.

- CATHRYNE ALLEN 

(Art: Peace to Your Heart by Greg Collins)

REDEEMER

 

“The Eternal Father well understood the diverse natures and varied capacities of His spirit-offspring; and His infinite foreknowledge made plain to Him, even in the beginning, that in the school of life some of His children would succeed and others would fail; some would be faithful, others false; some would choose the good, others the evil; some would seek the way of life while others would elect to follow the road to destruction.

“He further foresaw that death would enter the world, and that the possession of bodies by His children would be of but brief individual duration. He saw that His commandments would be disobeyed and His law violated; and that men, shut out from His presence and left to themselves, would sink rather than rise, would retrograde rather than advance, and would be lost to the heavens.

“It was necessary that a means of redemption be provided, whereby erring man might make amends, and by compliance with established law achieve salvation and eventual exaltation in the eternal worlds…..It was not His design that the souls of mankind be lost; on the contrary it was and is His work and glory, “to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man” (Moses 1:39).

“The offer of the firstborn Son to establish through His own ministry among men the gospel of salvation, and to sacrifice Himself, through labour, humiliation and suffering even unto death, was accepted and made the foreordained plan of man’s redemption from death, of his eventual salvation from the effects of sin, and of his possible exaltation through righteous achievement.”

-          (James E. Talmage, “Jesus the Christ” p 18)

FATHER’S CHARGE:

Long ago,

When you lived in my arms

You wanted to fly

In the vast expanse of the skies.

I gifted you wings,

And promised I would

Teach you to fly.

Just remember, I am here, but

It is your turn now,

To rise.

- CATHRYNE ALLEN 

(Art: All Is Calm by Gabriel Heaton)

INEXPRESSIBLE JOY

 

My patriarchal blessing tells me that my voice was heard singing praises to our Heavenly Father ‘when the morning stars sang together and all the sons of God shouted for joy’ as we rejoiced about the Plan of Salvation.

I have often wondered what it was that I was singing. Does ‘praises’ mean my individual expression of gratitude or does it mean a set song that we all learnt and sang in unison? The fact that the Lord told Job that we sang together would mean it was a set song (Job 38:7). There is another indication that this might be correct.

We are told in Doctrine and Covenants that the righteous will be gathered out from among all nations and come to New Jerusalem singing songs of everlasting joy at the onset of the Millenium (D&C 45:66-71). In particular, we are told we shall sing a NEW song indicating that it will supposedly supersede the OLD song we sang in pre-earth life (D&C 84:98-102).

Whereas the old song we sang heralded our joy of journey’s beginning made possible by Christ our Redeemer, the New Song will shout our grateful praise to Him who has fulfilled all promises made to us so long ago.

This song will be so powerful and edifying that ‘no music has yet been produced that will compare with the music for this song’ (Smith, “Church History and Modern Revelation, 1:345; Doctrine and Covenants Student Manual p 185). Here are some of the words of vs 98-102:

“The Lord hath brought again Zion;

The Lord hath redeemed his people, Israel,

According to the election of grace,

Which was brought to pass by the faith

And covenant of their fathers.

The Lord hath redeemed his people;

And Satan is bound and time is no longer.

The Lord hath gathered all things in one.

The Lord hath brought up Zion from above.

The Lord hath brought up Zion from beneath.

For he stands in the midst of his people.

Glory, and honour and power, and might,

Be ascribed to our God, for he is full of mercy,

Justice, grace and truth, and peace,

Forever and ever, Amen.

We who will have begged the Saviour to come and had waited anxiously for His return will sing praises to His name with inexpressible joy. We will rejoice that we are at the threshold of the Millenial era of peace where our God and our King will reign in our midst with righteousness, peace and glory. Get ready…..

- CATHRYNE ALLEN 

(Art: Second Coming by Jechoon Choi)

LIFE

 

Yesterday as I reflected about life and all it entails, I felt like we have been sent down to hell. I reflected on terrible evils that we live amongst and all the suffering and agony some people go through. Terrible things presented themselves to my mind such as sexual abuse of little children and I was reduced to tears. I couldn’t stop crying.

I thought of the Atonement and I sought to understand why it only covers sins after they have been committed, why it could not have prevented some evils such as abuse of innocent little children so they did not have to suffer. Into my mind came a dimension of the Atonement I did not understand fully before: this life is not a life of prevention.

To my remembrance came a dream I had some years ago. In that dream I saw a newborn baby lying on a table. The baby was a girl and she was only a baby in physical appearance. She was in reality an adult who was speaking to two women that were there reluctant to cut the cord because of the pain it would cause. She was saying: “it’s ok, it will only hurt for a little while and then all will be well”. I knew this baby was me and I knew she was very cognizant of earth life and its purpose.

I knew yesterday as I reflected on that dream that we, who chose this second estate, also chose all the suffering that came with it because we knew it would be temporary and that after all the suffering, the Saviour’s Atonement would make us whole again……that He shall one day ‘wipe away all tears from our eyes and there shall be no more sorrow, nor crying, nor pain’ (Revelation 21:4).

I am amazed at the Saviour’s capacity to take upon himself all the human suffering. I am bewildered by His descent into the bottomless pit of human agony. So excruciating was the suffering He bore that it resonated into another continent causing the physical destruction and upheaval in ancient America.

The prophet Zenos prophesied of this destruction saying that ‘many of the kings of the isles of the sea were wrought upon by the Spirit of God, to exclaim: The God of nature suffers’ (1 Nephi 19:11,12). As I cried for the little children yesterday, I cried for Him too….

Oh the sweet, sweet agony

That tossed You onto the sea of

Merciless pain and suffering!

The nature shook

But silently wept eternity

Cradling in its arms Your glorious destiny.

 

I dreamed that You were waiting

At sweet Garden’s gate;

Your sacrifice complete,

Your promises kept,

I could scarce contain my joy

As in Your arms I wept.

 

You rose to heights unknown

To someone lowly like me.

You are now so high

And I am so low,

Climbing the ladder of my tears

Into Your arms that I will forever know.

- CATHRYNE ALLEN

(Art: Gethsemane by Danny Hahlbohm)

THE FINISH LINE

 

 

In my darkest moments, when I have thought I could not endure my life to the end, I was given assurance from above that the Great Eternal Father has made provision for my every moment of suffering, my every moment of weakness, my every occasion of loneliness and despair, my every failing. When in heavenly realm He planned for the earthly probation of His children, He understood so well that we would need heavenly help to lift us higher, to strengthen, to empower, to ensure our success. 

This provision, this redemptive power, comes through His grace and mercy in the most sacrificial way imaginable. It comes through the offering of His Son. It comes through the benevolence of the loving Father so that we can never say, “I can’t do this, I can never make it.” 

The very thought and utterance of such a declaration denies the power of the Atonement and the costly gift of Calvary.  I know that the death of Him who has given His all ensures my success in enduring to the end. I know He watches, and He cares and He waits to meet me at heaven’s gate.

You warned me there would be mountains to climb

But promised there would be resting spots along the way;

You warned me of the subtle pitfalls

And how deep and wide the waters I would wade.

But you promised me Your hand in mine

Every minute of the day

And that You would meet me at the finish line

When I had conquered all there was to pay.

- CATHRYNE ALLEN 

(Art: Well Done by Chris Brazelton)

ETERNAL PERSPECTIVE

 

 “We talk about our trials and troubles here in this life, but suppose that you could see yourselves thousands and millions of years after you have proved faithful to your religion during the few short years in this time, and have obtained eternal salvation and a crown of glory in the presence of God; then look back upon your lives here, and see the losses, crosses and disappointments, the sorrows arising from disobedient children, from wicked parents who have opposed their children who wished to embrace the truth, the persecutions from city to city, from state to state, being hunted and driven, you would be constrained to exclaim: ‘But what of all that? Those things were but for a moment, and we are now here. We have been faithful during a few moments in our mortality and now we enjoy eternal life and glory with power to progress in all the boundless knowledge and through the countless stages of progression, enjoying the smiles and approbation of our Father and God, and of Jesus Christ our elder brother.” (Brigham Young, Teachings of Presidents of the Church)

“I have fought a good fight, I have finished my course, I have kept the faith; henceforth, there is laid up for me a crown of righteousness which the Lord, the righteous judge, shall give me at that day: and not to me only, but unto all them also that love His appearing.”  (1 Timothy 4:7,8)

I would rather be a vessel in Your hand

Than a crowned king on earthly throne;

I would rather be a bird in flight

Without a shelter to keep me warm;

I would rather cross the oceans

And go where you would want me to go

Than sit contented never knowing

the trail that leads me home.

- CATHRYENE ALLEN

(Art: Guiding Them Home by Yongsung Kim)

THE WILL OF GOD

 

I am certain we are all in awe of the Saviour’s submission to God’s will in the face of unfathomable agony of the Garden. Even though He foresaw more agony yet to come, He was willing to see it to the end.

What is, in reality, God's will? If God's work and His glory, meaning His entire purpose, is to bring to pass ‘the immortality and eternal life’ of His children, then this becomes His will. Whereas immortality means resurrection for all, eternal life means a life with God the Father, forever, because Eternal is His name (D&C 19:10-12). It means to be exalted to the status of gods. In our pre-existence, we chose to accept this will of God. Our lives were planned and shown to us and we gave our consent. My dearest friend reminded me recently that even the Saviour was shown His life to which He consented but even He didn’t anticipate how incredibly hard it was going to be (Mark 14:33). And so it is for us. Now that we are here, we see the reality of it, and some of us are no longer on board with God’s will and choose not to follow through to the end.

When the Saviour said to the Father before the earth was formed, ‘Thy will be done and glory be Thine forever’ (Moses 4:2), He gave up His own will and He affirmed that choice throughout His mortal life. The same is asked of us. Our mortal lives are a continual round of trials and ups and downs and so it also becomes a continual round of acceptance of God’s will. It is a choice we are faced with over and over again. It is seldom a one off choice which sees us through every rough spot in our mortality.

That Christ wanted to atone for us due to His love for us cannot be disputed (John 15:13). However, as He descended into the bottomless pit of human agony in the Garden, it was His love and commitment to the Father that made Him accept the bitter cup (Matthew 26:39). Our telestial telescope does not give us a clear view of eternal life. It is our love for the Father which has the power to enable us to accept His will for our immortality and eternal life. When that love is strong enough then we can say as the Saviour said, “I always do those things which please Him” (John 8:29). That’s acceptance. That’s love. That’s life eternal.

I long for God’s acceptance

Of the paltry offerings of my heart;

Hardly seeing His approval

Through my earthly inept sight.

Yet crafted with the heaven’s pen,

Sealed and sent through heaven’s door,

Ever constant, ever present,

From loving God that I adore.

• CATHRYNE ALLEN

(Art: He Lifts Me Up by Danny Hahlbohm)