I give you my patience
That you might follow your path;
I give you my understanding
That you might love you more;
I give you my forgiveness
That you might learn to love;
I give you my tolerance
That you might grow;
I give you my wisdom
That you might have courage.
I give you my witness
Of the fountain of it all
In whom if you believe,
You will never fall.
From my heart to yours;
Forever more
Because a heart can give no more.
-
CATHRYNE
ALLEN
(Art: Mother In Zion by Greg Sargent)
Often
in the Church we talk about the importance of missionary work. I don’t know if
we all realise that the greatest missionary work we will ever do is within the
walls of our homes, with our children.
Section
29 of the Doctrine and Covenants speaks of little children being redeemed by
the Atonement of Jesus Christ as they are not accountable until they are eight
years of age. And then a mandate that their preparation for accountability
rests upon the shoulders of their fathers ‘that great things may be required at
their hands’ (v 46-48).
I
believe that bringing up our children within the light of the Gospel and
teaching them to walk in the paths of righteousness is a responsibility we will
be judged on the most. If we fail in this, the sins of our children will be
upon our own heads (D&C 68:25-28).
Sometimes
we might doubt the ideals of the gospel that we teach and believe in, such as ‘a
family that prays together, stays together’ and ‘train up a child in the way he
should go and when he is old, he will not depart from it’ (Proverbs 22:6).
Obviously, this does not always work as many of us have children who have
rejected the gospel despite the best efforts of us, their parents. I have
pondered on this as my own daughter has walked away from the teachings of her
youth.
I
have come to understand this: 1. If we had no ideal, there would be no striving
for salvation; 2. We don’t know which of our children will get hold of our
teachings, therefore, all need to be taught. I have one daughter who is very
active in the Church and bringing up her children in the Gospel; 3. If we, as
parents, don’t do our part, our children would have the right to blame us for
their choices; 4. We don’t know when the fruit of our efforts will come to
fruition. It might be in this life or the next.
Section
68 is specific that we need to teach our children “faith in Christ, the Son of
the living God” (v 25)……because this is where salvation lies. What we pass onto
our children, gets passed onto generations of our posterity, the bad and the
good.
I
look at my daughter and see the spiritual guidance and teachings she is giving
to her children that I never received in my childhood from my parents and I
think, I have done a bit better and she is doing better still.
The
covenant of obedience that I made with the Saviour when I was baptised stands
as an example of hope to my daughter who has followed in my footsteps and my
grandchildren who are following in hers. That hope is in Christ, who has
overcome the effects of sin for all human family. It is because of Him that our
hearts can be turned to our fathers with forgiveness and love that endures
forever.
I give you my patience
That you might follow your path;
I give you my understanding
That you might love you more;
I give you my forgiveness
That you might learn to love;
I give you my tolerance
That you might grow;
I give you my wisdom
That you might have courage.
I give you my witness
Of the fountain of it all
In whom if you believe,
You will never fall.
- CATHRYNE ALLEN
(Art: A Mother In Zion by Greg Sargent)
Some time ago I wrote about
the father-son relationships in the Book of Mormon. I find nothing more
endearing than a strong father figure. When I read
this
touching declaration in the Book of Mormon: "I am Helaman, the son of Alma"
(Alma 58:41), I go weak at the knees. Alma’s legacy of righteousness and
service had no doubt great impact on his sons, but his parenting was not a whit
behind. Alma took the command he received to teach his sons with great
seriousness (Alma 39:12). His counsel to them reads like personalised scripture
sermons.
To Helaman, the heir apparent,
Alma entrusted the gold plates and impressed upon his mind the seriousness of
his charge and the importance of scripture. He stressed that the record in his
possession was sacred because it will be the instrument of salvation for future
generations (Alma 37:18). He impressed
upon him that the safety of the record depended upon Helaman’s obedience to the
commandments (v 16). And then the warning: if he transgressed the commandments,
the plates will be taken away from him ‘by the power of God’ and he shall be
delivered up unto Satan, ‘that he may sift him as chaff before the wind’ (v
15). I think you cannot get more serious than this. Considering who Helaman
became, we can conclude that he understood that. “I am Helaman, the son of
Alma” has more meaning than just a parental lineage, I think it also stands for
“I am my father’s son”……..
Whereas Helaman’s counsel
consisted of two lengthy chapters, the righteous Shiblon who was chosen for the
mission to the Zoromites, only received one relative short one but the emotive tone
of this chapter is unmistakable. Shiblon’s faithfulness, patience, diligence
and long suffering during his ministry was rewarded with terrible treatment
from the Zoromites to the point of stoning (Alma 38:4). It makes one weep to
read of it. One cannot fail to feel Alma’s joy about this obedient son. His main
counsel to Shiblon was to remember to put his trust in God, always, for his
deliverance (v 4). I think Alma felt Shiblon would need that remembrance for
future trials he might have to suffer.
Alma recounted his conversion
experience to both Helaman and Shiblon but not to Corinaton who engaged in
serious sin and abandoned his mission (Alma 39:2-3). His counsel to Corinaton
was extensive and covered four chapters during which he called him ‘my son’ 24
times. The anguish and compassion and love is unmistakable in these chapters. It
is evident that all three sons received counsel they individually needed. What
Alma addressed in his talk with Corinaton was what he ‘perceived’ this son needed
to hear (40:1; 42:1). This was obviously needed more than his father’s
conversion story because Corianton repented and resumed his missionary labours
(Alma 42:31). He remained ‘a just man walking uprightly before God’ like his
brother Shiblon (Alma 63:2).
Reading ‘my son’ so many times
in four chapters reminded me of someone else who said the same. When Joseph was
a prisoner in Liberty jail in 1839 he called upon the ‘Lord God Almighty’ out
of his anguish and in response he received: ‘My son, peace be unto thy soul….”
(D&C 121:4,7). In 1830 Joseph received a revelation for Emma in which the
Lord addressed her as ‘my daughter’ (D&C 25:1). As a side note, this is
another proof of Joseph’s validity as a prophet because it would have never
occurred to him to call his wife ‘his daughter’.
The Saviour confirmed that
‘all those who receive His gospel are sons and daughters in His kingdom (D&C
25:1), therefore every bit of advice, every bit of counsel, every warning,
every expression of love, mercy and tenderness in the scriptures given to us
from the Saviour is counsel, guidance and command from a concerned, loving and
invested Father. He is the ultimate ‘Alma’. May we view the scriptures we hold
in our hands as the fatherly counsel we should cherish all the days of our
lives.
- CATHRYNE ALLEN
(Art: Suffer the Children to Come Unto Me by B. Laura Wilson)
This is what I learnt from Nephi today. As I opened the Book of Mormon to start yet another journey through its pages, I noticed a word I had always read but not taken much notice of before. This is the word: “I Nephi, having been born of goodly parents, therefore, I was taught SOMEWHAT in all the learning of my father……” (1 Nephi 1:1). It is easy on first glance of this quoted scripture, to surmise that Nephi was such a good man because of his parents, but it is clear by this word that he did not give them all the credit. The dictionary defines ‘somewhat’ as: to some extent or in some measure or degree. What Nephi is clearly saying here is that ‘the great knowledge of the goodness and mysteries of God’ (v1) was more a product of his own effort than of his parents. That is evident through personal tutoring he received from an angel whilst seeking to know the meaning of his father’s vision of the tree of life (1 Nephi 11). In fact, it can be seen throughout Nephi’s life as he demonstrated how willingly he took responsibility for his own salvation.
It is human nature that we as parents beat ourselves up when we have wayward children feeling that we have somehow failed. I have been there myself. What we can learn from Lehi’s family is that our children’s salvation depends more so on them than on us. Try as they may, Lehi and Sariah did not succeed in keeping all of their children on the straight and narrow. I will not elaborate on parents’ responsibility in parenting here. My intent is to make parents of wayward children know that there is hope through the mercies of the God that we love and worship; a God who honours righteous parents and holds their fragile hearts in the palm of His hands; a God who sorrows over our wayward children as much as we do; a God who has suffered for their disobedience and destructive choices; a God who desires to save each and every one of us; a God who will not forsake those whom we love and yearn to have back in the fold; a God of mercy; a God of forgiveness; a God of love. This is the assurance: “Though some of the sheep may wander, the eye of the Shepherd is upon them, and sooner or later they will feel the tentacles of Divine Providence reaching out after them and drawing them back to the fold” (Joseph Smith, “Hope for Parents of Wayward Children”, churchofjesuschrist.org).
Fear not, they are in His hands…..
One day when Your tears cease to fall
For the ones that go astray
And You reach for them from Your throne
Your power to display;
I will praise
I will rejoice
I will join the heavenly throng in song
For the return of the lost
For whom You suffered for so long.
