FEAR

 

I was privileged recently to be given a deeper understanding of ‘fear’ through a personal experience that I will not recount here as my aim is to share the lesson I was given instead. Rest assured though that I have had my battle with this principle so I speak from my own frame of reference.

I concede that the adversary uses fear as a form of control but I am talking about deep seated fears here that we ourselves have created which sabotage our growth, our direction in life, and even our faith in God. Fears that subvert our path in life, cause mistrust, rob us of peace and use us like puppets on a string disguised as an unseen enemy.

Most of you are familiar with the scripture that says, “for God has not given us the spirit of fear but of power and of love and of a sound mind” (2 Timothy 1:7). The sound mind is for us to discern falsehood from reality. Fear is not reality. Deep seated fears are usually a residual effect of traumatic experiences we have been through.

Fear has no substance, nevertheless, we somehow hold onto it thinking it will protect us from wading into some deep water again that at one stage sought to drown us. Some fears are so deeply engrained in us that we are not even aware that we are harbouring them.

This is the lesson I was taught. Fears too are covered by the Atonement of Jesus Christ. Since painful damaging experiences in life are worthy of the healing power of Christ, it goes without saying that fears, being a resultant part of those experiences, are covered by the same redeeming power. We can be healed from them the same way we are healed from consequences of sin, abuse, mistakes, injustice, and every pain known to man.

If you are carrying an experience in your life, that you cannot get past, consider that fear is at play. The Saviour doesn’t want it to control you. He is the Prince of Peace who grants freedom from any debilitating part of mortality. He is waiting to heal you. There is nothing which impedes our growth that He has not atoned for: fear not, only believe.

 I kept my fears so close to my heart,

They hid so well not wanting to depart.

They pulled the strings

And bade me where to go;

They owned my soul

More than I wanted to know.

 

You took possession of the inner me

And thought that change

Would suit me beautifully.

You entered my heart

when I gave You the key

And replaced those fears with tranquility.

 

- CATHRYNE ALLEN 

(Art: The Source of Peace and Serenity by Ivan Guadarrama) 

A FORGIVING HEART PART 2

 

At times Joseph suffered as much opposition in the Church as outside.

In early 1844 a group of apostates in Nauvoo, Illinois, declared the Prophet Joseph Smith to be a fallen prophet and tried to start a rival church. Some even held secret meetings, during which they plotted to kill him (Glen L. Leonard, Nauvoo: A Place of Peace, a People of Promise [2002], 357-62).

 

One of these people was W.W. Phelps, an author and a poet, who wrote 26 hymns in the original hymnal. He was Joseph’s close associate who left the church for a time with Oliver Cowdery. He became fiercely anti and wrote an incriminating affidavit which landed Joseph and Sidney Rigdon in jail and wreaked deadly havoc on the Church community.

 

W.W. Phelps eventually became wrecked with guilt and had a miraculous change of heart. He desired to repent and wrote a letter to Joseph, asking for forgiveness of all the saints, in the name of Jesus Christ. Note the forgiveness was requested in Jesus’ name, who is the very embodiment of said attribute. Even though he yearned for forgiveness, he didn’t expect the reply he received to his letter.

 

Joseph responded: “Dear Brother Phelps, it is true that we have suffered much because of your behaviour. The cup of gall was filled to the overflowing when you turned against us, however, we are yet alive and I shall be happy once again to give you the right hand of fellowship.  Come on dear Brother since the war is past, for friends at first are friends again at last. Yours as ever, Joseph Smith Jr.”  

 

Joseph re-instated W.W. Phelps into the Church fellowship by the unanimous vote of all the saints in Nauvoo whom he influenced in the matter of forgiveness. Later W.W. Phelps said he struggled to understand Joseph’s capacity for forgiveness and love.

 

The hymn “Praise to the Man” was written by WW Phelps to express love and gratitude for Joseph upon his death, and it was sung at his funeral. What a great tribute to the man who exemplified the Saviour through his forgiving heart.

Some of us have brought with us spiritual attributes we developed in pre-existence. They can never, however, match the Saviour’s level of perfection. Forgiveness is one of those attributes.

For instance, I often hear that we should forgive our enemies and those who hurt us like the Saviour did whilst on the cross. I ask, how many of us are capable of such forgiveness in the midst of such excruciating agony? This kind of forgiveness is on a higher level that we cannot reach on our own.

Forgiveness is central to Christ’s character but not to our own. Not especially in this weakened condition of mortality. Comparing us to Christ is like comparing apples to oranges.

I had a conversation with a dear sister once who told me it took her 12 years of intense therapy to forgive someone. I reflected on my own experience of much needed ability to forgive whilst in excruciating pain due to divorce some years ago, which took only months to gain through fervent and persistent appealing to Christ’s power of the Atonement. I was granted what I asked for and to this day I cannot hold a grudge of any proportion.

By virtue of our discipleship and by being faithful in keeping our covenants, we have ‘increased access to the power of Jesus Christ’ and need not suffer unduly. We can still become free when forgiveness is beyond us. (see President Russell M Nelson, “Overcome the World and Find Rest”, Liahona 2022, p 96)

A true leader who leads masses of imperfect and flawed people would have to have this attribute under his belt for those who claim they represent Him, need to in some way, be like Him. Nobody needed the gift of forgiveness more than Joseph. I am certain that the Saviour knew this and endowed him with this gift, either in this life or before. He must have known from His own experience that Joseph would not survive otherwise.

- CATHRYNE ALLEN 

(Art: Joseph the Man by Joseph Brickey)

THE FINISH LINE

 

 

In my darkest moments, when I have thought I could not endure my life to the end, I was given assurance from above that the Great Eternal Father has made provision for my every moment of suffering, my every moment of weakness, my every occasion of loneliness and despair, my every failing. When in heavenly realm He planned for the earthly probation of His children, He understood so well that we would need heavenly help to lift us higher, to strengthen, to empower, to ensure our success. 

This provision, this redemptive power, comes through His grace and mercy in the most sacrificial way imaginable. It comes through the offering of His Son. It comes through the benevolence of the loving Father so that we can never say, “I can’t do this, I can never make it.” 

The very thought and utterance of such a declaration denies the power of the Atonement and the costly gift of Calvary.  I know that the death of Him who has given His all ensures my success in enduring to the end. I know He watches, and He cares and He waits to meet me at heaven’s gate.

You warned me there would be mountains to climb

But promised there would be resting spots along the way;

You warned me of the subtle pitfalls

And how deep and wide the waters I would wade.

But you promised me Your hand in mine

Every minute of the day

And that You would meet me at the finish line

When I had conquered all there was to pay.

- CATHRYNE ALLEN 

(Art: Well Done by Chris Brazelton)

THE INTEGRITY OF A GOD

 

I would like to bear witness of the power of the Atonement of our Saviour Jesus Christ because in reality it has saved me already. Here is my story. When I was a young teen I had to choose between my family and being baptized. I felt driven to join the Church so I chose to leave my family. I wanted what the Church promised me, eternal love and eternal family. I was baptized at 18, I went on a mission at 21 and at 25 I married a returned missionary who I felt God had appointed as my eternal companion. Instead of riding off into celestial sunset, I was left divorced with two children 11 years later. I felt utmost betrayal by God. I was hanging by a thread and I learnt the true meaning of ‘a broken heart’.

The loss of a dream was excruciating to me. In one fell swoop the ideal was ripped out from under me and I became a statistic in the Church. My emotional pain was so great I thought it was going to rip my chest open. I knew, however, that somehow there was one person who could mend me and save me. That person was the Saviour. I studied about the Atonement and placed the petition for healing, through my faith in Jesus Christ and the power of His Atonement, before God’s feet many times during the day. The copious amounts of tears I shed over the ensuing months proved my faith in this, the only process I trusted that could restore me to a functioning human being capable of forgiveness. All that I asked for during this process was granted me. I emerged a far better person than I had been before, my trust in God was restored and my testimony of the Saviour’s saving grace became the foundation of my endurance of many trials I have faced ever since.

In the past 30 years since my divorce I have gone from strength to strength. I have become who I am today, not because of my trials, but because of the Atonement of Jesus Christ. During my time of seeking the healing I needed, I had a blessing by my new Bishop. In that blessing I was told that my life had been planned for me and that because of my great faith in Jesus Christ I had accepted that plan long before I was born. So you see I was just playing out in reality what was a spiritual blueprint of my life in pre-existence. How could I have had such undaunting faith in the Saviour and His saving grace before either of us were even born? This is why:

“Over long eons of time in the premortal realm he [the Saviour] proved faithful and dependable and honorable in every commitment, every responsibility, and every charge. The scriptures tell us that ‘from eternity to eternity he is the same’ (D&C 76:4). He never deviated from the mark, never slacked in his performance, never shrank from his word. He kept every command with exactness; he discharged every duty with precision; he was ‘not slack concerning his promise’ (2 Peter 3:9). His promises were ‘immutable and unchangeable’ (D&C 104:2). As a result, his spiritual credit was rapidly escalating until it was pure gold, even infinite in value. That is why the laws of justice could recognize the benefits of the Atonement BEFORE the purchase price was ever paid, because his promise, his pledge, his credit was ‘good for it’, and everyone who honored their first estate knew it….It was not only when he appeared that he voluntarily laid down his life, but he voluntarily laid down his life from the very day the world came into being. Then he came forth in order to take it, SINCE IT HAD BEEN GIVEN AS A PLEDGE. Based on that pledge or covenant we had faith in him. Based on that covenant the Father could promise remission of sins PRIOR to the atoning sacrifice because he ‘knew’ his Son would not fail. The issue was not that he could not break his covenant, but rather, that he would not.”

(Tad R. Callister, The Infinite Atonement, pp 80,81)

 

Did You count me amongst

Your valuable host

As we met in the councils of heaven?

Did I stand strong and ready

To defend Your godship;

To smite the enemy,

To secure Your path to my eternity?

Was I brave and willing to carry the cross

Some of the way to Calvary?

Did I weep with you in the Garden

And hold You as You bore the burdens of mortality?

Did I wipe the sweat off Your brow

As I wept for You and weep even now?

Did I promise to bear Your name

Etched in my mortal heart for all to see?

Am I now worthy to carry Your sacrifice

With me into eternity?

- CATHRYNE ALLEN 

(Art: Come Unto Me by Yongsung Kim)