BEING WEAK PART 4

 

I have taught several lessons over the years on the gifts of the spirit as outlined in D&C 46.  The last time I taught about it, I learnt that besides their purpose to enrich the Church spiritually, they are an incredible tool for overcoming weaknesses. 

I got so convinced by this last lesson that the gifts of the spirit should be sought for this purpose that I started to wonder if one of them could help me with a long-standing weakness I had. 

As I pondered about it I realised I didn't know which gift was needed for me to have for this particular weakness so I decided to pray about this and ask which gift I should seek.  I knew the answer that came to me was straight from above because I would never have come up with it in those words on my own. 

I have a very strong sense of justice which sometimes robs me of ability to show mercy. Add to that a somewhat dogmatic manner which created clashes over the years with people, necessitating later apologies.  This weakness caused me to stand up for myself even in less important situations such as customer service. 

The gift I was told to pray for was the gift of 'forbearance and self-restraint'.  As I contemplated this definition of the gift that I needed, I realised I had other weaknesses that could be overcome with this gift.  It was rather humbling to discover I had so many weaknesses that they could be grouped into a whole category!

I thought obtaining this gift was going to be a simple matter of praying for it and one day I would wake up with it under my belt ready to take on the world.  Unfortunately, it didn't prove to be that simple.  I prayed many weeks for this gift and one day I had another 'customer service' incident that left me feeling less than good about myself.  I was wrongly done by and I gave as good as I got. 

I walked away thinking I really could have used the gift of forbearance and self-restraint that day and wondered when I was going to get it.  As I thought about it, I realised what I had been doing wrong.  When I remembered, I prayed for this gift during my prayers and then I would forget about it. I realised this is not calling upon God for help at all.  I remembered the scripture in Ether 12:27.

I realised I lacked humility and faith in 'receiving' this gift.  I could see it was not enough to just pray for the gift in my daily prayers.  What I needed to do was humbly call upon God for my gift to be active in the moment that I needed it and then act in faith as if I had it. In other words, some effort on my part was needed as well.

I realise it can be very hard to make yourself call on God in the moment when you are facing your weakness instead of giving into it there and then. The gravity of habit is mind blowing.

Perseverance can be a hard road because overcoming weaknesses, even with God’s help, is a process and not a race run in one day. It is a race run EVERY day for as long as it takes, until one day that weakness becomes a strength.

When a weak link in your character becomes a force for good and blesses not just yourself but the lives of others, you know you have arrived.

The longer it takes to overcome something, the more steadfast is the change in our nature and less likely the relapse. Everything takes time in mortality. So what drives us to make the effort? When we no longer want to be the person we see in the mirror…..

 

I will scatter my prayers upward

Like birds in flight reaching for Thy throne;

I will seek Thy strength

I will surrender my soul.

- CATHRYNE ALLEN 

(Art: Divine Faith by Greg Collins)

THE PATH TO PERFECTION

 

A friend suggested to me that the Saviour’s admonition to be 'perfect' is a verb as it was originally written, that it virtually means to be ‘perfecting’. She also said, ‘that feels totally doable’ and it certainly does because it suggests that perfection is a life long journey.

I don’t have a reference to back up that the Saviour said ‘perfecting’ as in both the Bible and the Book of Mormon it says ‘perfect’ but I have something else to offer which might support this theory. It is interesting to note that when Jesus commanded us to be perfect (Matt 5:48), He did not say ‘sinless’. For us to be sinless living by faith in this telestial mortality is an impossibility. However, what is more interesting in His statement is this: The Greek word for sinless is ANAMARTETOS. The Greek text, however, does not use this word but rather it says ‘be ye therefore TELIOS’. ‘Telios’ means to be brought to its’ end, finished, fully developed, having fulfilled one’s purpose or having fulfilled the measure of one’s creation. What is our purpose? To be tried and tested without forsaking God. This can be proved by the Saviour’s example. He said to the Jews ‘be ye therefore perfect as your Father in heaven is perfect’ (Matt 5:48) but to the Nephites He included himself in that statement (3 Nephi 12:48). Why? Because he had by then finished His purpose and endured to the end.

When it comes to perfection our focus should be first and foremost in surviving our trials without losing faith and trust in God and secondly, it is the striving to become that is the process of perfection. This is our path for now more than anything but when we are sanctified (cleansed) and justified (brought back in alignment with God), our faithfulness to Him will complete the circle of perfection.

In my quest for perfection I have found this: the closer I get to my Father in heaven, the less appealing my weaknesses and sins become because a desire to please Him has taken over the ‘I should’ mentality. It is always easier when you tackle something out of desire rather than compulsion. I spoke of this in my last post. If you gain a genuine desire to please God, your inclination to engage in your sins and weaknesses will gradually dissipate. When our desire to bring honour and glory to the Father is genuine in our hearts, our focus on self diminishes and our journey to perfection is assured. This is the path that the Saviour travelled from beginning to the end. May we follow in every footstep He left behind that we may return into the loving arms of the Father who is patiently waiting…..

I long for God’s acceptance

Of the paltry offering of my heart;

Never seeing His approval

Manifested plainly in mortal sight.

Yet crafted with the heaven’s pen,

Given through the heaven’s door,

Sealed with love and sent direct

From the seat of His eternal throne.

• CATHRYNE ALLEN 

(ART: God Calling by Youngsung Kim)

OVERCOMING WEAKNESSES

 

Desire is everything. Let me clarify that. Righteous desire is everything. I am sure most of us have at one time or another been perplexed by the Saviour’s commandment to ‘be perfect’ and maybe we have even dealt with feelings of hopelessness in regards to this commandment. There are two things to understand when we think of ‘perfection’ though. The first is understanding our mortal weakness, and the second is understanding the path to rising above it. 

 

According to the Bible Dictionary, weakness is the primary condition of mortality and a state of being in this fallen world. It is unavoidable because mortality means weakness. Weakness means being human. The weakness of mortality is manifest in individual weaknesses and frailties that each person has.  In Ether 12:27, Christ told Moroni: "If men come unto me I will show unto them their 'weakness'. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble...."  Notice the word of 'weakness' is singular here. This is the condition of being weak. What the Saviour is referring to here is the weakness of mortality, not our individual weaknesses, of which He speaks in the latter part of the scripture when He says: "...for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them". The weak things He speaks of are in reference to individual 'weaknesses'. 

The latter part of this scripture is where the hope of freedom lies. Herein lies the importance of recognising our weak condition of mortality and thereby acknowledging that we cannot rise above it without the divine power. This is the conviction which propelled us to accept Christ as our Saviour in the beginning. The weakness of mortality was given to us to bring us to the source of all power, that source being Christ. Discovering this truth in mortality is like stepping back in time behind the veil. Unless we understand on a deeper level that we need the Saviour to enlarge our capacity, we will not be able to overcome our mortal shortcomings and navigate our mortal journey successfully long term. 

 

Here is the crux of the matter. It is one thing to know that we ‘should’ and another having a desire to do it. It is difficult to WANT to give up your weaknesses because they usually come with pay offs. None of us indulge in weaknesses that don’t give us something in return. It is my testimony that the more you yield your heart to God on consistent basis, you will develop this desire. Once this desire gets planted in your heart, it becomes so much easier to become the person you want to be and should be and came here to be. Then it becomes easier to hand over all your stumbling blocks. The more stumbling blocks that you remove from your path to righteousness, with the Saviour’s help, the more you will rise to higher ground where an elated state of being exists. When you come to this higher ground you will come to understand what the love of God is because you will be filled with it. I assure you this is the place you want to be. The weaknesses with all their pay offs do not compare with this state of being EVER.

 

“…….bridle all your passions that ye may be filled with love…..”

Alma 38:12

 

A river of peace floods my mortal being.

I struggle to contain such a merciful gift;

With grace You enlarge the sparse capacity of my heart

And righteousness moves within me as the waves of the sea;

I love You more dearly

I serve you more freely

I become what I alone could never be. 

- CATHRYNE ALLEN

(Art: Robe of Righteousness by Phil McKay)

 

NEW YEAR GOALS

 

Many of us will have begun to set goals as we approach the New Year. I gave up on that futile exercise many years ago. I discovered I don’t do well when I feel compelled to do something, even if that compulsion comes from me. Now I focus on spiritual aspects of my life’s journey more. My focus for next year will be ‘faith’. I have a burning desire to become a woman of faith at a much deeper level than what I have thus far been. This desire is linked to my understanding of faith being a component of righteousness. It has been given me to understand that learning to harness the power of faith is my next step on my life’s journey. 

 

Statistically, setting and reaching goals has very poor results. It has been estimated that 80% of people who set New Year resolutions drop out of the race after the first month. Many of you will disagree and say that goals are important. I understand if this is something you are converted to and have had success doing. The only point I am trying to make here is the highly advantageous surrender to Him who has all wisdom and knows us beyond our mortal understanding, to guide us on the path of our self-improvement and growth. When we are equally yoked with Him in our efforts to change and improve, the odds for succeeding are extremely high. Trusting Him to reveal to us where we should improve next so we can become who we need to be to fulfill our purpose here is where we should invest our finest efforts. 

 

If you are struggling with sin, weakness or addiction, the Saviour is the rudder of your ship when you put out to sea. If you have been floating on the waters of tribulation, He can point the way to the safe harbour and steady the turbulence of the storm so you can rise to your greatest potential. Do not trust in your mortal efforts alone, turn to Him who has all power to overcome and lift you to heights you need to be at.  I promise you, if you trust Him to show you the way, you will find His footprints even in the deepest seas……

 

I will step into deeper waters

And abandon the ground under my feet;

I will wade and look for You,

I will see Your footprints

Even in murky seas.

I will reach and find Your hand

To guide me where I am meant to go

I will trust, I will surrender,

Your purpose for me to know. 

- CATHRYNE ALLEN

(Art: David Bowman)

UNDERSTANDING OUR WEAKNESS

I don't know of anyone who sees weakness as a positive thing. None of us want to be weak. We don't want to be seen as weak and we don't want to feel that we are weak. The world tells us we need to be super achievers and excel in all we do and that it is up to us to make ourselves successful.  For this reason we persist in making goals and tackling that which is beyond our capacity to overcome, relying solely on our motivation and willpower.  Both motivation and willpower are incredibly difficult to maintain and so we beat ourselves up when we fall short. And in the process we allow our weaknesses to define us.

Consider alcoholism. The weakness of drinking has now become the weakness of disease. I consider the mental aspect of alcoholism to be the most dangerous one. I do not agree with Alcoholics Anonymous who define people as 'alcoholics'. What's worse is that they tell people they are alcoholics for life. I get it, they want people to be vigilant but what happens when you label yourself? You act and behave according to that label. If you think you are an alcoholic you will always struggle with the temptation to drink. Even some who abstain from drink for years fall off the wagon because in the end what does an alcoholic do? An alcoholic drinks.

The danger comes in saying 'I am'. I AM is highly declarative. Once declared, it becomes a reality you live by. The Saviour declared himself to be The Bread of Life, The Fountain of Living Water, Alpha and Omega, The Great I AM, because that's who He is. It is important that we recognise that what we do is not who we are. In my opinion, It is better to say, "I am dealing with the issue of alcoholism" than to say "I am an alcoholic". This gives one hope that he or she can become free from the weakness of drinking. The world, however, does not offer this hope.

This is where it becomes important to understand 'weakness'. According to the Bible Dictionary, weakness is the primary condition of mortality and a state of being in this fallen world. It is unavoidable because mortality means weakness. Weakness means being human. The weakness of mortality is manifest in individual weaknesses and frailties that each person has.  In Ether 12:27, Christ told Moroni: "If men come unto me I will show unto them their 'weakness'. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble...."  Notice the word of 'weakness' is singular here. This is the condition of being weak. What the Saviour is referring to here is the weakness of mortality, not our individual weaknesses, of which He speaks in the latter part of the scripture when He says: "...for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them". The weak things He speaks of are in reference to 'weaknesses'.

The latter part of this scripture is where the hope of freedom lies. This is where Alcoholics Anonymous get it partly right. They acknowledge their powerlessness and turn their will over to their 'higher power'. This is where their success comes from, not from drumming into people that they are alcoholics. Herein lies the importance of recognising our weak condition of mortality and thereby acknowledging that we cannot rise above it without the divine power. This is the conviction which propelled us to accept Christ as our Saviour in the beginning. The weakness of mortality was given to us to bring us to the source of all power, that source being Christ. Discovering this truth in mortality is like stepping back in time behind the veil.

Unless we understand on a deeper level that we need the Saviour to enlarge our capacity, we will not be able to overcome our mortal shortcomings and navigate our mortal journey successfully long term. What is in reality this deeper level of understanding? It is a consistent appeal to Christ, in faith, to endow us with His atoning power so we can permanently overcome the weaknesses of this life and become free.

The Saviour 'descended below all things' for a purpose, so that He might comprehend all things (D&C 88:6), meaning all our sins and our weaknesses. In the words of Elder Tad Callister: "....you cannot sink farther than the light and sweeping intelligence of Jesus Christ can reach.....as long as there is one spark of the will to repent and to reach, He is there....." (The Atonement of Jesus Christ, April 2019). 

- Cathryne Allen, Did Not Our Hearts Burn When He Opened To Us The Scriptures?

published 2021 by amazon.com

A GLIMPSE UPWARD

I have carried with me a sense of powerlessness my whole adult life. I know I did not bring this with me from my pre-existance because I know instinctly this is not who I am. I am not a powerless person yet the sense of powerlessness has been the bane of my life and has held me back from my fullest potential and greater success in this life.  I consider my spiritual life well developed but anything of temporal nature has been a struggle for me and fulfillment in many ways has eluded me. This sense of powerlessness has damaged my self-esteem and robbed me of self-belief to the point that I have many times felt I have been a failure in my life. Recently the frustration of this noose around my neck reached its peak.

I have known for some time that this weakness had come to me from many generations of my family who were poor oppressed European peasants, that had existed from the time of the feudal system to socialism, and who believed they could never rise above their station in life. I had seen this powerlessness perpetrated in my family throughout my childhood and early adulthood in Europe. I have known my family's thoughts, their false beliefs and their words of affirmations that invited suffering into the lives of my immediate family. From the time that I have received the Gospel in my life, I have not been able to understand why I was born into this lineage. I am the different one, the one that seeks and knows and loves God. The one that has largely departed from my roots. My recent sense of frustration over my life sent me to my knees where through bitter tears I spat out to God that I hated my family and all the generations I have come from; that I hated who they were and what they have saddled me with. I had never expressed such venomous thoughts before, to myself or to others, let alone to God. I begged to understand why I was sent into this family and why I carried their burden.  Within half an hour of my prayer, my heart and mind were flooded with immense understanding.

When the Saviour said  'my sheep hear my voice' (John 10:27) he was referring to those who are so spiritually advanced that they  recognise and wholeheartedly embrace the truth when it is presented to them. Bruce R. McConkie taught it is a spiritual gift that was developed in pre-existance. I was 16 when I sought and immediately accepted the Gospel into my life. I count myself as one of His sheep. What has all this got to do with my ancestors? It was given to me to understand that those who are His sheep are often sent to families who need a spiritual shepherd to help them with their unbelief. I came to understand that the sense of powerlessness in generations of my family had blinded them to a 'hope through the atonement of Christ and the power of his resurrection, to be raised unto life eternal' (Moroni 7:41); that what once was a temporal has now become a spiritual stumbling block.  I came to understand that no amount of saving ordinances which I can do here in the temple can do anything for them unless this sense of powerlessness was removed  so they can believe that they can rise to godhood.  I came to understand that my long held desire to bring souls unto Christ had more to do with generations of my family than with any other people I can yield influence over living here during my life time. I came to  understand that it is up to me to eliminate this feeling of powerlessness in my life and therefore eliminate it from generations past and generations to come. This made me understand that what we do and overcome in this life reverberates throughout generations that have been and the generations that are yet to come; that it reverberates through the genetic cord which binds us and unites us in a collective effort to rise to our potential; that what we achieve and overcome here in mortality echoes throughout eternity. I came to understand that we are one and that the power to lift one another to higher ground that we might all become co-heirs with Christ is one of the greatest tender mercies of the Lord.

Living by faith is a hard road. Glimpses into heaven such as these however make the journey bearable and the road illuminated. They propel us upward and above the world. They open our hearts to the witness of the plan of salvation and the reality of our real home. They make us know who we are; that we belong to Him who has loved us and made us free, to Him who has prepared heavenly mansions for our eternal abode; Him who has spiritually begotten us as His sons and daughters; Him who has made the immortality and eternal life of man possible; the Saviour, the Redeemer, the Everlasting Father, the Almighty God, the Son of Righteousness, the Great I Am, the Lord of Glory, the King of Kings, the Stone of Israel. All glory be His forever.

"Hast thou not known?

Hast thou not heard, that the everlasting God,

the Lord, the Creator of the ends of the earth,

fainteth not, neither is weary? 

There is no fathoming of his understanding.

He giveth power to the faint;

and to them that have no might 

he increaseth strength.

Even the youths shall faint and be weary, 

and the young men shall utterly fall:

But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength;

they shall mount up with wings as eagles;

they shall run, and not be weary;

and they shall walk,

and not faint."

- Isaiah 40:28-31